Saturday, August 09, 2008

Whatev

I'm sure it comes as no surprise to you that Bud is one cool dude. Lately he's been adopting a cool attitude with me, complete with cool 'tween language - rendered, of course, in his own inimitable Bud-speak.

The other day I was ranting at him about something that I clearly thought was important and he clearly thought was not. "Bud," I blathered, "You have to stop blah blah blah, or else it will blah, blah, blah, and then we'll have to blah, blah, blah...." You know how it goes.

Bud's face was the picture of pre-teen ennui, and he placated me in that condescending tone that kids reserve exclusively for their parents: "Kill ouch, Mom."

I knew instantly what he was trying to say, and I seized upon the teachable moment: "Bud, you mean 'chill out.' People say 'chill out' when they want other people to relax and stop making a big deal of something. So you wanted to say 'chill out' to me, and not..."

"Mom," Bud interrupted.

"What?" I asked.

"Kiiiiiiill ouch."

23 comments:

Jordan said...

NO. WAY. This is hilarious. I'm going to adopt that: "Kill ouch" I think I will say it to myself - it'll make me smile and break all of my internal tension!!

(One of my kids asked me a question in the car recently and then, as I was innocently answering, said grumpily, "Mommy? Be quiet and just drive the car." I have a feeling he'll be the first to tell me to chill out in a few years. Damn!)

drama mama said...

Can I fix him up with Miss M? We were listening to "Sunset Boulevard" in the car the other day (don't ask) and I was explaining that Miss Desmond USED to be famous and admired, that she USED to feel special...until Miss M interrupted me and politely said, "Oh, sort of like you...a lesbian?"

She meant *has-been*.

Jaw dropping all the way around.

Thanks for a great lil' story.

Niksmom said...

OMG! I don't know which made me laugh harder...Bud's new 'tude or Drama Mama's comment! ROFLMAO! *snort*

'course, with my luck, Nik will sing something to me one day like "Sit down, John!" (1776). Then you'll have your revenge! ;-)

[my "word" tonight? fcngr...sounds angry and obscene if you say it out loud...]

Osh said...

Everything on this page brought the lolz (look at me trying to be cool my son would say)

Maddy said...

Classic!

hollywoodjaded said...

I'm so using this.

Anonymous said...

My son heard some kid at school say shut up to him. He didn't know what it meant and used it in a weird and awkward way to me. I then explained to him what it meant and that we don't say that to each other. He then looked me straight in the eye and said, "Can I say shut down then?"

kristina said...

Sooooooo cool I meant kill!

Mama Mara said...

I think it would be ausome if "kill ouch" became the phrase du jouracross the country. Use it in our posts, our comments, and before you know it, Miley Cyrus will put it in her lyrics, and every preteen will be on the kill ouch bandwagon.

Kill ouch rules.

Anonymous said...

Good for you for attempting to teach your son the correct pronunciation. That should be an ongoing endeavor to protect him from total embarassment when he (heaven forbid) is ridiculed by a peer for incorrect speech.
My son once told me about a a really fun game called, "tap"; I corrected him to say "tag" and was glad for it.

Robin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Robin said...

I love kill ouch. Go Bud! I think I'm going to adopt it too. Think I could still pull off the eye roll sarcastic tone thing? I'm only a few decades past tween...

Bonnie said...

My DS just turned 13! Its getting harder and harder to just kill ouch!

Stacy said...

It's kind of fun to hear them coming up with their own version of 'tween language. Go Bud!

Daisy said...

"Kill ouch." I think I'm going to adopt this one.

Bella said...

Kill Ouch.. That's cute. Goodness, I'm going to use that for weeks now.

kristi said...

LOL...very cool.

Janine said...

It's amazing that I found your blog this morning.
My son also had an obsessive fear of the clouds in good weather or bad.
We have had him on Zoloft for two weeks. He also takes Risperdal.
Well, the weather thing has gotten way better, but he has gotten very defiant and mean. The same thing happened when we tried Prozac.
Please could I have your email address?thanks.

MOM-NOS said...

Janine, it's momnos at gmail dot com. I look forward to hearing from you.

Carrie Wilson Link said...

Oh my hell of God, that's funny! : )

Sustenance Scout said...

Just wait, it gets even better! K.

Heckyeah said...

My Aspie is 3 years old. THREE. When she requires a time-out for an obvious, blatant infraction, she sighs, looks up at me and says "Moooommmm... RELAAAAX."

???? THREE!!! ???

I'm now going to try to relax because I can't imagine what the teenage years will be like! Ack!

David said...

Sorry to be so late on this comment, but I have similar excuse of working at a busy college etc. blah blah blah.

"Kill ouch" actually makes good sense, I'm sure you've already noticed, and is pretty much equivalent to "chill out".

Yay Bud! Thanks for the new Bud-ism.