Sunday, November 04, 2007

'Scuse me while I kiss this guy

Bud and I were riding in the car today, when Bud asked out of the blue, "Mama, what's a country roads?"

I glanced around to see if there was a sign outside that he was reading, then, seeing none, I said, "Well, it's a small street, in a place that's not too busy. Kind of like this street."

Bud was quiet for a minute, then asked, "Mama, what's a oh feeder monkey size?"

"A what, honey?"

"A oh feeder monkey size. What's a oh feeder monkey size?"

I played it through in my head: Oh feeder monkey size. Oh feed her, monkey sighs. Oaf eater, monkeycize! Oh, feed our monk, he sighs. Our feet are monkey-sized. I was stumped.

"Bud," I said, "I don't know what that is. Where did you hear that?"

"From Dierks."

From Dierks? Oh feeder monkey size?

Then it hit me: Country roads.

Country roads. Oh feeder monkey size.

"Country roads. Old theatre marquee signs.": the first line of Dierks Bentley's "Every Mile a Memory," and a classic case of mis-heard lyrics. In my book, "oh feeder monkey size" is right up there with Creedence Clearwater Revival's "There's a bathroom on the right."

What's the best song lyric you've heard someone get wrong?


Anonymous said...

A song you've heard wrong is a mondegreen, after a person who misheard "They've slain the Earl o' Morray and lain him on the green" as "Lady Mondegreen".

I don't have any amusing ones myself, though.


Niksmom said...

ROFL at this one! I can't recall any that I've mis-heard but then, my memory these days isn't so sharp... Thanks for the giggles.

Wade Rankin said...

My favorite: the misunderstood line from Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds, in which "the girl with colitis goes by."

Bea said...

Due to a grave error of judgment, I found myself listening to the Hi-5 Christmas CD approximately eight times this weekend, and during "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" one line says "like George Washington!" Pie giggled helplessly and said, over and over again, "Not George Washingtail!" What that means in her two-year-old mind I have no idea.

Anonymous said...

I love Elton John's "count the head lice on the highway."

kristina said...

Not quite an answer to the question but this all makes me think of Charlie singing "Voodoo Chile" in the shower last night!

Anonymous said...

You know that traditional Christmas carol - "Gloria, in eggshells, she's day old."

Anonymous said...

Well, I still struggle with Bruce's being "wrapped up like a douche in the middle of the night."

My husband used to think that the lead singer for Squeeze was "pulling muscles for Michelle," which I gather was some sort of macho show-off thing.

My daughter used to sing about Rudolph and his friends, "Comet and Cuban, Donner and Splitzen," and about Baby Beluga 'way out yonder where the dolphins play, "where you dive on special days."

But I know my favorites were those old faux Pauls, and I just can't remember them!

Oh - "Jo Jo was a man who thought he was a woman, but he was another man."


Anonymous said...

Has anyone seen the new PBS show with Super Why and the Super Eaters? ;)

There is also Carly Simon's "The Stuff-ed Green Tomato" (The Stuff that Dreams are Made Of)

And from Elton John, "I would've liked to have known you, but I was just a pea..."

kristen spina said...

Ah, too too many to count. Thanks for setting my brain working this morning. What fun! I wouldn't be surprised if there is an entire website devoted to "mondegreens".

MOM-NOS said...

I've always enjoyed the Jimmy Buffett classic "Margaritaville": "I blew out my flip-flop; stepped on a Pop Tart."

MOM-NOS said...

VTBudFan, my favorite Faux Paul of your husband's was in "Back in the USSR". The actual lyric is "All the way, the paper bag was on my knee. Man, I had a dreadful flight," which is obviously a reference to air sickness.

But your husband heard it as "Only way to paper bag was on my knee," and he thought their travel experience was ruined by the difficulty of managing bagged lunches without a tray.

Anonymous said...

From Outkast's "Hey Yeah" My sister thought the line was " Shake it like an overgrown peach ya" Everyone knows its " shake it like a polaroid picture". In our house it will always be an overgrown peach! Thanks Shell LOL -N

Ange said...

Bubba is my singer and has a million of them, but I love it because eventually we all start singing his version. Years ago, my one shoe wonder sang this:
"I went down down down and the planes went higher."

gretchen said...

Before Henry came along and co-opted all things Disney, Kate used to sing along so sweetly with her daddy to the Aladdin soundtrack. She interpreted "endless diamond sky" as "necklace diamond sky."

Ms. TK said...

Why, it's that top-ten by Kelly Clarkson: "Stupid Be Gone" - Since You Been Gone interpreted by my 4 year old.

mommy~dearest said...

Mine would be from the Kiss song Rock and Roll All Night.

Real lyrics: You keep on shouting-
My lyrics: Nude people shouting-

Mine were way more interesting, for the record.

Jaysen's would be from Drake and Josh.

"It's gonna take some time to meet around. Everyone over and holder and roller in town..."

What a fun post!

Phoebe said...

From Stairway to Heaven, actual lyrics:

"And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our souls"

Misheard version:

"And there's a wino down the road
I should have stolen Oreos"

Thanks for the laugh!

Anonymous said...

A friend of a friend who was a guitarist, and played with Captain
Hook in Europe, and while in Europe heard a very earnest guitarist playing "Smoke on the Water" by Grand Fulk Railroad only he sang "Slow Motion Walter, fire engine guy...."

they barely got out of the club before burting into laughter.

Suzanne said...

hee hee, my hubby has a long history of word hearing problems. "Whistle Man" was what he thought This Old Man was called well into his 30's. Another that makes me laugh is "Ding Them Bells" (JingleBells). Knowing he has this difficulty makes it easier on me, when I think he's not listening.... he's just not hearing.
from a friend's dad... Barry Manilow singing "Looks like Tomatoes" (Looks like we made it)

Anonymous said...

VT bud fan, I had the same problem, but I thought Bruce was saying "reved up like a douche, you know the ruler in the night." There is a website, one of my favorite, Thanks for the laugh.

Anonymous said...

My friend sings: "Da-da-da-dada, da-da-da dada, I wanna piece of cake" (I wannna be Sedated)

I have another good one, but I can't think of it right now!

Jeannie said...

My favourite mondegreen is from my sister.

I'm sure Fleetwood Mac didn't mean for her to sing "Don't stop thinkin about the mop".

Daisy said...

These are wonderful. I'm laughing out loud at the comments! I am hearing impaired, so I often hear lyrics wrong. It does get humorous, but I usually don't get the real ones!

MOM-NOS said...

Some number-related mondegreens:

My cousin thought Kenny Rogers had it much worse than he did, when she mis-heard the chorus of "Lucille" as: "You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille. With four hundred children and a crop in the field."

And the daughter of a friend thought the late 90's song "I'm Too Sexy" was some sort of math game about the number 264: "I'm two-sixty-four my shirt, two-sixty-four my car..."

Moi ;) said...

Oh, that is a howl!!

I don't recall any lyrics he got wrong, but he did make up a few...

You know Antiques Roadshow? He used to sing...."Show and tell, Show and tell..." ;)

Anonymous said...

Melissa Etheridge:

real lyrics: I wanna come over! To hell with the consequence!

I heard: I wanna come over! To hell with the concert plans!

I developed in my head a whole scenario about her missing her own concert to have an affair. Much more exciting that way, I think. Imagine how irritated her publicist would have been.

Anonymous said...

Steve Winwood's "Bring Me a Higher Love" = "Bring Me a Tie I Love"

Queen's "Another One Bites the Dust" = "Another One Rides the Bus"

And from my husband: "Wouldn't It Be Lovely" from My Fair Lady -- the line "Lots of coal making lots of heat" = "Lots of cow making lots of meat"

Anonymous said...


I literally thought until this very moment that "Jojo was a man who thought he was a woman, but he was another man" WERE the correct lyrics to that song. What are they???

Tahirih said...

My daughter, at about five, used to belt out "I saw a bunny, up in the skyway! ...This land belongs to you and me" The lyrics are "I saw above me an endless skyway" I thought her words were more kid friendly.

Anonymous said...

More from Elton's famous 'head lice' song that Connie referred to earlier in these posts:

'Hold me close young Tony Danza' instead of 'Hold me closer tiny dancer'

I want to know how young we're talking here - 'Who's the Boss' or even younger??

mommy~dearest said...

Haha! I thought of another one- The song "Africa" by Toto-
I thought they were saying "There's nothing that a hundred men on Mars could ever do".

anon- it's actually "Jojo was a man who thought he was a loner, but he knew it wouldn't last".

mom-nos, tell your cousin I thought it was 400 children too. (Why would they be hungry? Eat the crop in the field!)

Anonymous said...

I thought of the one I had forgotten: From Violent Femmes "Blister in the Sun" - actual lyric: Body and beats I stain my sheets I dont even know why
Kat's lyrics: "When I eat beets, I stain my sheets I don't even know why..."

MOM-NOS said...

Thought of another this week while I was watching Clash of the Choirs - from Louis Armstrong's "What a Wonderful World": "The bright blessed day, the dogs say goodnight..."

MOM-NOS said...

I keep hearing Phil Vassar's "Love is a Beautiful Thing" on the radio. It's a song about a wedding, and EVERY time it's on I hear these lyrics:

"Throw the rice in the air,
Let the church bells ring,
Tie the kids to the back of that limosine"

They are, of course, tying cans to the limo...

k e r r y said...

until this morning I thought the lyrics to the Violent Femmes song, Blister in the Sun was "when I eat beets, I stain my sheets!" Now I know it is "body and beats I stain my sheets..."

Anonymous said...

oh! too funny! had to stop by to add one. Song: Aerosmith - Dude looks like a Lady (which I even knew the title for)
Misheard lyrics: chorus - "yeah, yeah... do the naked lady"! Much funnier, in my humble opinion.

Another one. Song- Nelly - Hot in Here. Actual Lyric: "You know dance in front your mirror while your on the phone
Checkin your reflection and tellin your best friend,
like 'girl I think my butt gett'n' big'..."
Misheard as: "girl, I think my butt can bend".


BoosMom said...

Every time you go away, you take a piece of MEAT with you. ;)