I read about your big appearance in New York on Kristina's blog, AutismVox, and about the tie-in you're doing to raise money for autism research. Then I went to check out your new website. The problem is that I checked it out while Bud was with me.
Oh, wait. You don't know Bud. Well, you probably get this all the time, but I mean it sincerely: Bud is your number one fan. Need proof? You can start here - or simply type "Teletubbies" into the "search blog" bar above. You'll be amazed by the number of posts that pop up. Bud is a dedicated, over-the-top fan. Oh, and he's also autistic.
Anyway, from the website we watched footage of you on the Today show, walking through the streets of New York and standing in front of the Statue of Liberty. And then we saw the interviews - first the one that showed you in costume, and then the one that revealed the four actors standing inside them: John Simmit, who plays Dipsy; Pui Fan Lee, who plays Po; Nicky Smedley, who plays Laa Laa; and Simon Shelton, who plays Tinky Winky. I watched Bud for a reaction: would he be crushed to learn that it was all illusion, and that you were regular people inside oversized costumes?
Just the opposite. Bud was delighted. The interview confirmed for him that you are not just characters who exist inside a screen. You are actual people who don your suits and go places. You get on airplanes. You go to New York.
You could come to our house.
Bud started planning immediately: He would write you a letter inviting you over to play. He would ask you to sleep over. It would be great. (I should point out to you here that Bud does not invite people to come to his house to play. This is a big deal. This is a Very. Big. Deal.)
I told him I didn't think you could go to kids' houses, but he wouldn't be dissuaded. He went straight to the computer and he typed like I have never seen him type before. He took care with spelling, going back and correcting the errors he spotted. He paused to consider how he wanted to word his request. He stopped typing in mid-sentence to ask me if you would have trouble getting your tummies into sleeping bags (I told him I thought you bought really big sleeping bags. Do you?) He even used punctuation - an apostrophe. I had no idea he knew how to use an apostrophe.
His letter is below, unedited. The words and the sentiment are his entirely:
deer teletubbies i want you to come to my house and play with
me and hav a bath and i dry yoer entenass i will put you in your seepingbags and you will go to mom and dad`s bed and sleep with me
As soon as he finished typing, he ran to the front door to wait for you. He was sure you were coming.
I told him how busy you were. I told him you had to make TV shows and movies and books, and that all of those things took a long time. I told him you had to do your jobs.
He said he'd wait until you were finished.
I told him that you have to work every day, and that you live in England, which is very, very, very far away. I told him it would take ten hours to fly here, and that you couldn't possibly come to visit and get back in time to do your jobs.
He suggested that we could drive to England to visit you instead. I told him that England is on the other side of the ocean, and that cars can't drive across the ocean. He said we could take an airplane. I told him that it costs a lot of money to take an airplane to England. He headed for his piggy bank.
I told him that we'd have to keep saving our money, and that when he is 18 we can take a trip to England. I have no doubt that he'll hold me to it.
So I'm sure you can appreciate the bind I'm in here. Bud will be 18 in ten-and-a-half years. How in the world will we find you when we get to England in ten-and-a-half years? And will you still have access to the suits?
You could really do us a favor and save us a long, angst-filled decade if you'd just come over for a night. I mean, we can't offer the allure of Manhattan, but there's a real charm to our tiny town in the woods. We know how to cook all your favorite foods. And you will experience a genuine, innocent, guileless love the likes of which you have never known before.
One thing I do need to mention, though: The bit about "Mom and Dad's bed?" I'm sorry, but I really have to renege on that point. Nothing personal. I hope you understand.
Anyway, thank you for taking the time to read this. Bud is absolutely certain that his "guys" won't refuse his invitation. Just to be safe, though, I'll be saving our pennies and planning our trip to Europe in 2017.
Either way, we look forward to seeing you.
The NOS family