Sunday, April 23, 2006

Give means take

More inspiration from Charlie Fisher.

In the latest post at Autismland, Kristina recounts a conversation between Charlie and his dad, Jim:

"Giff," said Charlie, handing Jim some colored balls he had been rolling around. "Give, he means take, give means take," said Jim, walking up the stairs.

In Autismland, give means take.

It really does.

On the most basic level, "give" means "take" the way "you" means "me," the way "you want juice" means "I want juice."

But it's more than that. At least it is in my corner of Autismland.

Because over here, giving Bud what he really needs means taking the time to pay attention to him, to read his cues, to notice the subtle changes.

Giving him every advantage means taking his perspective, trying to think a step ahead, and imagining how whatever it is that's coming might appear to him.

Giving Bud the time he needs and the respect he deserves means taking pride in the remarkable accomplishments he makes.

Giving him opportunities means taking risks.

Charlie's got it right. In Autismland, give means take.

Yes.

5 comments:

Kristina Chew said...

I was going to write a post about just this! Very glad you've taken it up and given me some more insights into Autismland vocab!

Anonymous said...

My daughter is 17. I'm learning so much about what was going on in those younger days, when we didn't know what the deal was.
She got a gold in State Forensics this year. Every day I feel a little less panicky.

Wendy said...

"Giving him every advantage means taking his perspective, trying to think a step ahead, and imagining how whatever it is that's coming might appear to him." - I can't say that I'm totally there yet. I try my best to anticipate how C will react to different situations and sometimes I'm right, sometimes I'm wrong. I have learned from all of the reading I've done that it's best to remain quiet after saying something or asking a question because it might take longer for an autistic child to process what's being said. I wish C would talk more so I would have a better feel for his perspectives.

MothersVox said...

That's beautiful. Thank you.

Melanippe said...

(Please bear in mind that English for me is a foreigh language)
On reading this, the first thing I thought when I read "giff" and then the following was, "Giff/give could as well be GIFT" :-)
Ippe